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From time to time, Mrs Nick seems to forget how competely useless I am at any form of manual labour, and insists that I do something useful around the house. I have just creosoted the fence using one of those handy time saving spray guns. I also creosoted the patio furniture, the window frames, myself and everything else within a 100 yard radius. I'm just off for a shower, which will no doubt block up when I wash the sludge off.

keep the creosote on Nick.. it will stop you suffering from a fungal rot!

I have just snuck into the house for a well earned cup of tea, after shifting a 1 tonne bag of sand, (bloody builders deposited it on the pavement just outside of the front door) I have now moved it, by the barrow load, round to the back of the house and spread it in preparation for the patio slabs, which have now been laid by my good self. I am just waiting for her to come back and say "is that all you have done?"

P.S. good luck with trying to unblock the sink Nick!

Interesting jobs fellas! My job today is to get our Volvo ready to put into a car rally and show. It all starts with a few friends and breakfast at our house tomorrow early, and a drive up Vancouver Island to Duncan where we meet up with about 300-400 other cars. Then we all drive down from Duncan to Mill Bay where we meet on the grounds of Brentwood College for a show and shine and a picnic that takes up the entire afternoon. We drive all country roads and the locals on the route all come out to see the parade. Of course our 1988 Volvo 240 will steal the show (not).

Well I sat in a white van for 12 hours today and did absolutely nothing!!! Will probably do the same tomorrow as well - very dull. I would much rather be shifting sand or painting fences in the sunshine!

OK I will do a deal with you Tim.....

come over here and finish putting the gravel down, I will go and sit in your little white van.... there is only another two tonnes of gravel to move, but please bear in mind that it has to be up to the exacting standards of Carol who has already pointed out the flaws in my patio laying!!!

As long as that's the only laying she points out the flaws in.